Match.Com is probably the funniest most entertaining site to sign up for free on. What started as a joke to humor my sister who previously actually dabbled with Match, has turned into a instant virtual amusement park.
What happens when you sign up for these things is that you think you may actually get some real perks of the site without paying...but lets be serious, as the saying goes (if its too good to be true...it probably is). basically you get to have their "matchmakers" select who they think you would be compatible with, get post info on your own profile and get "winked" -similar to Facebooks "poke." You can neither communicate with these matches or view the emails of those actually interested in you, but you can in fact see their pictures...so naturally thats the only amenity i need to keep me surfing through their database out of pure amusement.
As a perpetually single girl I figured what the hell, I have nothing to lose, and I never even considered actually talking to people (not that I even could - unless I shelled out a heafty 60 bucks every 3 months ..uh hi..no thanks!) It was simply some reassertion that I in fact am not an Ogre that voids off the male sex...I just simply need to meet someone who can handle my spunky nature.
So to Match I joined, and with new projects I develop an overwhelming amount of enthusiasm, so naturally I went over the top and wrote a ridiculous bio that I guarantee almost anyone fails to finish. Its bible-esque in length and equally loaded with my glorious anecdotes and confusing use of the english language - I figured I'd try to portray myself in the best way possible not to lead to any confusion in the future if for some reason I landed myself a man...still hasnt happened...im simply oozing with astonishment..
anyway.
So I joined, wrote my long "i have a sense of humor and like to use metaphors" bio and saddled up to what I thought was just a simple harmless free membership...but see now what I didn't know is that theres a reason for men my age/age checkbox to turn to online dating - theyre actually serious, cant talk to women in person, want to find a girlfriend, or option D check all of the above.
The matches I've been matched to have been comparible to quazzy moto. I mean this in the least harsh way possible, but I swear some of these individuals simply cant be real. They're either 59 with salt and pepper hair looking to make me their little hott totty - no seriously - i got a facebook message from one asking if he could "spoil me"
..can't make this ish up if I tried.
Or they're 19-20, stick thin and look like they've been locked inside of Harry Potters cupboard under the stairs on Privet Drive for the past 19.5 years ( the other .5 years I estimate was the approximate transition time from womb to earth)
Im off track.
So basically, my experience with online Dating has failed miserably. Maybe its because I shouldn't be on the site in the first place, orrr the fact that I don't pay for an actual membership, but regardless, I have a damn good time sifting through my "winks" from strangers that If approached me in real life I would probably end up in a victims unit afterwards.
These descriptions are neither over exaggerated or meant to sound superior..not in the least bit..but simply I find that the match making process is skewed. I check my specifications - looks are never my number one priority - I am in fact a personality girl..but when it comes down to men 30 years my senior, or children that probably wouldn't even be able to lift me off the ground, it becomes a joke.
I'm not sure why or how I get the the curds of the creme but apparently its the Almighty's way of telling me that I belong with a skinny, pale, grandpa like man (I simply consolidated the qualities of the two given examples to find the medium).
Below I share with you my thoughtfully composed Bio - I share this with you in question of why I keep getting paired with such an array of individuals that I feel aren't my most compatible haha judge for yourself...maybe I'm subliminally suggesting that thats who i'm looking for in my description, but I tell you one thing - Thats certainly not what I intended :
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Last year i electronically married myself off to my best friend on Facebook. Some people view it as pathetic, when i simply see it as a happily single girl not at all ashamed to announce her love for her best friend. Last week i received not only my first..but 10th message from the "man from the foreign land" type asking if she really was my wife.
This is where i realized things must be done.
Actions must be taken, moves must be made, whatever you want to call it. Last week i came to a revelation. Yes I am young. Yes I have time. But my question is this. Why not. If i am married on Facebook, of the 1000 "friends" i have, who truely sees me as available? Last week it hit me like a big dirty Septa bus. It's time i take matters into my own hands and put myself out there. So this is my trial run.
Hello Match, I'm Darcy.
I am the ripe age of 20 years old. Young enough to know this is probably entirely unnecessary, but old enough not to care. I am Single. I am in college. I am petite. I love to have fun...and you've also now learned that I love my best friend. I myself am fixated on the act of making my life sunny (even if Philadelphia primarily isn't) and a knee slapping good time; thus far, I've practically morphed it into a semi-respectable profession.
I am currently an Advertising Major, Art Direction track, with an additional Minor in Art. I am extremely creative and passionate about my education, art, beautiful music, popcorn, and most of all, my Friends and Family. I am random, I love to smile. I love my job. and I absolutely adore my cheer team, but despite finding love for countless things in my life, I have yet to find Love.
Despite my outwardly lesbian Facebook status, my declaration is this. I enjoy men. I like to meet new people. Although my bubbly personality has never altered my ability to do so in the past, I foresee Match as a further assistant to broadening the pool of people i cross tides with in life, and as an additional plus, maybe even setting me up with someone who may just make me Cyber Divorce my gal pal.
I see dating as a priority, but not necessarily my first. I juggle alot i my tiny life between school, family, and working, and at this point i'm pretty exhausted at taking dating advice from other people. Some people tell me that I’ll find my guy when I’m not looking. Others tell me I have to put myself out there. Essentially, my approach to dating is terribly confused. So i figured i'd jumble it up even more and join this site!
Although i have no real preferences, i do view myself as a romantic, and fairly old fashioned. Chivalry will always earn you brownie points, but having a sense of humor, confidence and passion for life would be a cherry to the sundae.
So saddle up white knights, because im yours for the taking, you've just gotta be willing to step up to the plate and make sure you hit it out of the park ;) **also - as a part of this trial, I fail to actually invest monetarily, so if you're at all interested cyber locate me on facebook or twitter. sexual predators not welcome.
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see. kinda funny. approachable.
I even typed out a disclaimer as to clearly state that I don't want to be as we say.. "spoiled" ...I just don't see where I went wrong. Because of these failed matches I've found it in myself to simply take their compliments and laugh it off...for I know I will never be their mate, but I wish them all the happiness in the future.
Because after accepting the notion that my love does not reside online, I have moved on to becoming entertained by all their profiles and what their interested in. I swear its like a free anthropology lesson. So much to learn about people. Its fun. I suggest you try. unless of course you're serious, in which case I recommend you actually pay for a membership, because then you can find people you can actually date apparently. who knows. but I most likely won't be finding out anytime soon..too much fun reading up on my geriatric suitors.
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